I lol'd for a bit V3.0

[pokiou]

i love this thread so ill try and contribute lol

[pokiou]

[Dub_Star_V6]

Why I heart Engrish...

In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom,
it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

In a Swiss mountain inn:
Special today -- no ice cream.

In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Tokyo bar:
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

In a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.

In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

In a Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air
conditioner:
Cools and Heats: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him
melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

[hooba]

Ten Thoughts to Ponder

Number 10: Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can
die.

Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without
an erection, make him a sandwich .

Number 7: Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person
to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6: Some people are like a Slinky-not really good for anything, but
you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals,
dying of nothing.

Number 4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.

Number 3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, and a
substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

Number 2: In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the
world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought: Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers--what you
do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

[hazrd]

[Tonz]

If peanut oil comes from peanuts
and canola oil comes from canola seed,
and if olive oil comes from olives

where


does


baby oil come from????

[Preen59]

where


does


baby oil come from????

Not where you'd think.

Tried it. Didn't work. Next door neighbour very upset.

[maca]

If peanut oil comes from peanuts
and canola oil comes from canola seed,
and if olive oil comes from olives

where


does


baby oil come from????

Same place babies come from

[team_v]

Same place babies come from

Baby seed

[gareth_oau]

Same place babies come from

ahhhhh -storks!!

[maca]

ahhhhh -storks!!

Is that what they're calling it in sex-ed? I dunno, my Catholic high school never had it.

[Buller_Scott]

Is that what they're calling it in sex-ed? I dunno, my Catholic high school never had it.

man, i had the misfortune of sex-ed coupled with ''make a family tree for this week's project''.

can you imagine having to figure out "who porked who, in your family, to finally get far enough along to produce you?"

emotionally destabalising.....

[maca]

man, i had the misfortune of sex-ed coupled with ''make a family tree for this week's project''.

can you imagine having to figure out "who porked who, in your family, to finally get far enough along to produce you?"

emotionally destabalising.....

All you have to do is imagine your grandparents screwing, your grandmother giving birth to one of your parents (naked) then your parents having hot, wild sex to conceive you. For added bonus; think about your own birth

[Buller_Scott]

All you have to do is imagine your grandparents screwing, your grandmother giving birth to one of your parents (naked) then your parents having hot, wild sex to conceive you. For added bonus; think about your own birth

when i get this post printed off and laminated, that's my official license to bash you when we meet, haha

[maca]

when i get this post printed off and laminated, that's my official license to bash you when we meet, haha

Bring it, bitch. I'll be in Melbourne for New Years. I SAID BRING ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.